It Takes Three
Growing up we are led to believe there is one “Soul Mate” for each of us and when we find the one “special person” to marry, it is for a lifetime. We are taught through reading the bible, society, and our families, a marriage is supposed to be monogamist. A couple that marries straight, gay, lesbian or bi-sexual is expected to remain faithful to their spouse until death tears them apart. Is this a realistic idea or is it something good in theory but nearly impossible in reality? Can a person truly be faithful 100% to their partner for possibly 75 years? Technically faithfully means, not looking at porn or other humans of either sex, no texting or using social media to flirt or hook up with others (innocently or not), no sexting and no flirting.
Are these demands logical? Can a person really commit to one person for a lifetime and truly have all their needs met by that one partner? Some say “yes”, though the divorce and infidelity rates show otherwise. Would marriages be more successful, if we had multiple partners?
If for example a couple is happy in every aspect of their marriage, but the bedroom, should they divorce or should the person not getting their needs met, get them met elsewhere. I don’t promote cheating, however if the couple honestly knows there is an issue in the bedroom that can not be fixed, is it wrong to openly agree to add a partner to the marriage to fill the void? In a committed otherwise happy marriage, if sex is the only issue and both partners are truthful, having the bedroom needs met elsewhere could be a healthy resolution.
Consider a couple who has been in a long term committed and happy marriage, when a partner has a stroke or an accident leaving them unable to perform sexually, should the marriage end because the disabled partner can NO longer satisfy their partner in bed? Or should the person be allowed to have their needs met by someone else (with their partner’s knowledge), while they remain in their happy and committed marriage?
In my experience talking to men and women of all ages, races, religions, straight and same sex couples….. Bedroom issues and faithfulness are the two biggest complaints.
I personally think polygamy should be legal, as it was in past times. Not cults or dictatorship type relationships, but committed, loving, trusting relationship where all the partners have all their needs met from the other partners in the relationship. Regardless of what the need is, emotional, financial, sexually or maybe even educational.
Many believe it takes three partners to completely fulfill one person’s needs. This is not to say one person can’t do all these things, or meet multiple needs of their partner, rather it is hard to do for a lifetime. Why does it require three people to complete one person successfully?
Every person male or female needs to feel wanted needed and respected! They want to feel loved, safe and secure. They want to have their sexually desires and needs met in a safe, loving and committed relationship. They want someone to communicate with, that will listen to their wants, needs and desires, without tearing them down or ridicule them. They want a partner who is trustworthy and honest. They want a partner they can build a strong foundation with emotionally, financially, sexually and that can last a lifetime.
Can all these requirements be met by one individual on a 24/7 basis for a lifetime?
The “politically correct” answer is “yes”, however reality proves otherwise.
History indicates couples need more than one partner to successfully fulfill their basic needs, wants and desires. Humans are the only bred in the world where monogamy is expected.
We have multiple cars, houses, jobs, kids, pets, outfits, bank accounts, meals… the list goes on and on, yet couples (humans) are expected to live a lifetime with just one mate. Not even animals live by this rule. Is polygamy the answer? Maybe it is!
It Takes Three….
- A person to meet Emotional Needs
- A person to meet Financial Needs
- A person to meet Sexual Needs
Those of you, who know the author of this piece, know she doesn’t live a traditional lifestyle. She chooses to live a controversial lifestyle, while being in a committed marriage. For her this works… her marriage was a roller coaster from the start, but the couple remained faithfully committed to one another, through financial difficulties, homelessness, starvation, major illnesses, deaths of family members and much more….
During their 3 decade long marriage there were many happy times, but these happy times were often bull dozed away by the monumental issues that plagued their marriage from the being. From drug addiction to medical and financial issues, they fought hard to keep their marriage together. In their late years of marriage the couple found happiness together again.
Throughout the 3 decade long marriage, bedroom fun was non-existent, though the couple remained together. One partner secretly wished to add another partner to the marriage. Unfortunately laws in America prohibit this type of committed relationship. Sadly this couple must choose to live in an unfulfilled marriage, because marriage is suppose to be monogamist. People around the world deal with this situation daily, is it fair?
I can openly and honestly say my heart belongs to more than one man for eternity and YES both men know and accept that fact! Does that mean I’m unfaithful? NO!
The truth seems evident, if we had multiple partners in a committed relationship, all the needs of all parties concerned would be fulfilled and more marriages would survive!